Be free-floating, allowing the situation to surround you, and be in it. Take in the full surroundings, including the temperature of the water.
This may bring incredible clarity, presence and focus. This is what is means to be a jellyfish.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Walking on Wednesday ~ True Test

The true test of any relationship is the assembly of cheap-ass Chinese pressboard furniture. We have spent the last 20 years testing our relationship doing this. This Ikea furniture thing wasn't around back then like it is now, but I imagine it's the same kind of test.

photo courtesy of George Takei on FB
Monday was one of the more recent tests. When the day started, we had no idea we would end up putting together 5 big-ass displays, with no directions, but a memory of how they went together.

We started out the day looking forward to spending it together. Normally a treat. But as the day went on, after moving a huge amount of heavy furniture, (remember, we have been moving crap for the last 2 weeks....) after re-arranging our new booth at The Regeneration Station, and "disagreeing" over many, many things along the way, we were then tasked with putting together those Chinese made, pressboard displays with some very heavy parts.

Keep in mind too, that we have 20 years experience with putting together Chinese-made pressboard furniture pieces. Your Wal-Mart bought pieces of garbage that when put together resemble nice furniture. 

photo courtesy of Jeff Klinger Research
Entertainment centers, bookshelves, desks, store displays, etc. We have been deciphering terribly translated directions for pressboard furniture assembly regularly throughout our entire marriage. Throw in years of childrens toys assemblies (many done last minute Christmas Eve), and we pretty near could be called 'experts'. 

Well, Monday tested our 'expert' status. We got the things together, but like experts? Well, they were put together well, but not very professionally.

After 20 years, we know how to disagree quite well. We discuss (talk very loudly..ok shout sometimes), repeat as necessary (up to 4 or 5 times the same thing), blatantly blame each other for our frustrations, until ultimately one of us gives or we both do, in and we come to some 'agreement'. 

We had to re-assemble these store displays from the shop. They had to be taken apart to fit through the doors and moved, and thus had to be put back together to be sold.
a Mind you, when we got them new, my children put each and every one together, no help from us. They didn't even argue (much). They just sat there, read the directions, did each task, voila display put together. 

Our CHILDREN (teenagers!) put them together - without arguing! 

We were already tired and frustrated. By the third display, after finding damage by the movers (which made our assembly a little challenging to put it mildly), we were at each other so badly we were making a scene. It sort of reminded me of trying to get our live Christmas trees in the house and on the bloody tree stand. I have heard other couples test their relationships at this time as well.

We 'disagreed' through the entire third display. Over the years, we learned that when things were going so badly, sometimes it is just better to not say a word, and get the job done. So, by the time we got to the last one (which had a damaged top so I didn't see the point of putting it together fully, but we did anyways), not a word uttered to each other since display 3, and we discovered we were one screw short. Icing on the cake.
photo courtesy of Wikipedia

We got it done, went home, and collapsed on the couch, next to each other. We both agreed (finally) we haven't had a worse day in as long as we could remember. 

After much Advil, a quick nap, and food, we realized really what a horrible day it had been, and we took it out on each other.

The stresses have been so many lately, and have affected everything we do, this is true, but we never should take it out on each other.

This is one lesson we have to learn over and over, but we do learn. We talk it out, we acknowledge the error of our ways, and we learn again. 

We vowed to not let it ever get that bad again. Especially assembling crappy f*ing furniture. We then vowed to never, ever, purchase a piece of crappy pressboard furniture ever again. 

1 comment:

  1. Ha! I hate putting that crap together. I always get it wrong!


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