Be free-floating, allowing the situation to surround you, and be in it. Take in the full surroundings, including the temperature of the water.
This may bring incredible clarity, presence and focus. This is what is means to be a jellyfish.

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Twelve Oh One ~ NaBloWriMo Day 12

12:01
photo from ClipArtETC
12:01.
That's what the microwave said when I went into the kitchen to get a glass of water.
12:01 a.m.
I had been laying in bed for about an hour.
This, after being woken up from the couch to go to bed because we have another very big day tomorrow.

We spent the day packing and organizing the shop downtown. 
My business, Blue Rage of Asheville, had a good run in its 8 College St. address. After a very hard summer, and saying so many times I couldn't count, 'There has to be a better way', the time had come to let this location go, and go find the the better way.

8 x 10 print by The Love Shop on Etsy
I spent all week carefully packing the fragile inventory, making sure all the consignors picked up their inventory, taking pictures of displays, dealing with banks, utilities, etc. Over 30 boxes, and probably 20 pieces of furniture and displays, and oh yes, the track lights and drop down lights, all packed up.

Still more to do tomorrow. Taking apart displays for easier move, trying to secure a warehouse space, hoping movers can really sweep in and move everything.

I am stressed. I was sleeping fine on the couch. Well, not fine really. A light sleep, comforted by the sounds of my family so closeby. Having to move to bed only woke me up and got my brain going. It was telling me 'This is impossible', 'You can't possibly get everything done in the time you have to do it.'

Thus, 12:01 is what I saw on the microwave, when I went into the kitchen thinking a glass of water would cleanse my head and help me relax, then sleep. However, my brain said Twelve Oh One! Crap!! Twelve oh one meant the day got away from me (as it seems has been happening regularly, since suddenly I can't get everything done in the time I need to), and I realized the blog had been neglected.  Another day of NaBloWriMo missed.

Why was I not willing to let this slip by? I thought getting it all out would help too, but really since I want writing to become a bigger part of my life, it seemed logical I get down to writing. 

Worry
photo courtesy of  Tammie on Pinterest
Even if it was twelve oh one. This counts as day 12, at least in my book. Tomorrow really hasn't happened yet, I have to get some sleep first. Then I will be able to tackle my day, and get as much done as I possible can, and try to figure out how to get more time to do everything I have to do. 

I am on my second glass of water now. (and will probably be up in a few hours to pee) 

Hopefully this will wash the worry away. I can't create more time, but perhaps I can make it all okay that some things take longer. It will have to be, for what is the alternative? There is none. It is what it is, I can only do my best, work my hardest, anything more is not possible. I will have given it my all. 

Will any of this help? At least I got my blog post in for NaBloWriMo. That helps. Little by little I will get everything done, somehow, some way. Maybe I can sleep now, though I am on my third glass of water (yes, will definitely get up to pee in a few hours), and it is now approaching One Oh One! (1:01 a.m.). Nighty night.

3 comments:

  1. I'm sorry to hear you had to close shop, but I know you will find something more amazing.
    And if you believe that everything will happen on time, then time will bend to your will. Stop thinking "there's not enough time" and start believing "there's plenty of time"...
    {{{hug}}}
    ~Sunfire

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  2. Wishing you a day full of strength and comfort that you get everything accomplished that you need to...and maybe you can write your Day 13 blog at eleven oh one today ;)

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  3. Sunfire, thanks for the hug! much needed. I love that you mention 'time will bend to your will'. It will have to, right?

    Undies, I will get as much done as possible, and that will have to be enough, right? Maybe eleven oh one may be filled with duties at the shop, but I am determined to get the post done at some time...maybe eight oh one, after a lovely dinner of something other than pizza....

    ahh, now I am dreaming....

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